Anyway. Hi! Apparently the p-zac wasn't for me. Boy were those some horrible and terrifying nightmares! Have you ever woken repeatedly during the night, utterly petrified and unable to get yourself out of it? Have you ever stayed up until four a.m. because you're afraid to go to sleep because of the men with razor blades and the monsters and zombies and gut-wrenching terror?
Well I sure hope not. Goodness! Get some help for that, would you?
It's already hilariously obvious that it was those meds. For one, my friend OCD is back and in fine form. Whee! And I'll get up and get something if I need it, instead of going Ehhhhh and eventually groaning my way out of the chair and straggling over to fetch it.
Also? Tension tamer tea totally tamed my tension! I apologize, tea. It was not your fault in the first place! What a lot of red herrings and confusion.
I just saw the word "timeously" in a book, meaning "in a timely manner." I'm sorry, but no. I forbid it. You may not apply those suffixes to that word that way. It turns the time part of the word into something that looks like a latinate root. Maybe it was a joke, but oh, these books! They used to be some of my favorites. But the more I read, the more irritated I get.
Is that the author being slapdash and lazy, or me getting bored with the repetitive stories and the way he has to hit a given set of scenes in each book like checking off a list? He probably does check off a list, actually.
Well. No, the first two books are fantastic, the third is very good, and after that, they get perfunctory. And even worse, he kind of forgets what makes the main character wonderful and turns her into this crabby judgy impatient self-satisfied dithery thing. She's short-tempered and rude to someone and then in the next scene gets self-righteously superior and annoyed with someone else for being short-tempered and rude. In other words, you would hate to deal with her in real life.
It's very very very annoying. I'm annoyed. Because the first couple of books are an absolute pleasure to read.
Timeously, my aunt! My foot! My aunt's foot!
It's brutally cold again. I've been thwarted a lot by the cold and/or snow lately. Let's just say it's not a good time of year to need to do things outside without your gloves on. Things involving things you don't want snow on. Oof. Also there's ungodly clutter everywhere and suddenly, after what, two weeks? Three weeks? It's UNBEARABLE. Which will mean a major fixing and tidying and packing and putting everything away tomorrow, I'm sure.
There are all these things that need to be done in sequence. That's part of the holdup. If Thing A can't get done, I try to work on Thing B as far as possible but get stopped at some point, so it's sitting there partially done also. And then I do as much as I can on Thing C and so on. You can just imagine. There will NOT be pictures.
I'd love to put my navy lambswool cardigan on the dog so I can work outside longer. He gets cold. He doesn't have a thick coat! But the sleeves are too long and also the ground is underneath him, where the cardigan isn't. He looks awesome in a navy cardigan, though. Corgi-adjacent dogs look so adorably nerdy. They almost have bow ties.
After all this horrible sleep and lack thereof, and the razor blades and Stanley knives and torturers and things, I'm delighted to tell you I'm getting verrrrrrry sleepy right now and might actually conk out. Let me just register a wish that my dreams will feature happy fun things like cozy couches and fuzzy bunnies and hot buttered rum and sci-fi on dvd and cushy quilts and sleeping warm furry animals. Yes. Nice things. Friendly, comforting, non-violent things. Okay? Okay.
Another clue that things were not right: I read John Green's Looking For Alaska and I was like, eh. Did not care. It amazes me that they can make medications that make you totally not care about things. Also I never want to take any again. For why because? What on earth? I know, anxiety, but the opposite of anxiety is not I don't care about anything whatsoever, not messes, not packing, not books that normally would have me bawling. That is not the answer! The opposite of anxiety is what? Awareness? Healthy reactions to things, that's what it is. Bad things, bad reaction! Good things, good reasion! Mess? Clean it up! Hungry? Cook food! And so on.
Ooooh, a yawn. Crinkly eyes watering. My dog is asleep. My cat is asleep. I might also be asleep soon. It could happen! Oh, more yawns! Hurray!